Ostensible Optimism vs. Hidden Optimism

I had an interesting experience this evening with a phenomenon I call Ostensible Optimism. It's those situations where you think you are trying to be positive, but in fact, the thought is coming from a fear-based place.

For example, let us say that you make a certain amount of money, and you've finally gotten to the point where you are earning the amount you want to make.

You're at a party, and someone comes over to you and asks: "Are you are happy with the amount of money you are making?"

In these situations you have 2 choices for answers.

(1) "Things are great and I'm totally satisfied with everything"; or

(2) "Things are good, but I'm excited to think about how much better they can be."

(You could also answer, "why the hell would you even ask me that," but you're trying to be positive.)

At first glance, #2 seems like it's really optimistic. You are saying, "hey, things are cool now, but wow, they can even get better!"

That sounds reasonably positive. But in truth - it depends. It depends on where your thoughts are coming from.

If your thoughts are coming from a place of, "yeah, things can be better, but to a certain extent I'm afraid that I'll make less next month because that's happened before" then you are actually having fear-based thoughts. Fear-based thoughts can appear optimistic, positive, expansive, but they only make you smaller. Ostensibly they seem helpful, but they are not.

But if your thoughts are coming from "wow this is great I'm so happy with what I'm making and I can't wait to see what else is in store," then you are more in line with the greatness that is you and where you truly on the right frequency. You are displaying Hidden Optimism, that has really become part of who you are.

Sometimes it helps to talk to a friend or a coach who can help you talk this out. When you are with yourself all the time you start believing your own, well, you know. Friends and coaches are great sounding boards, and you should use them to gain better clarity about your own intentions.

Most importantly though, is feeling the gratitude and appreciation for where you are. Nothing will change your world like appreciation. Appreciation is the antidote to fear, and it will take you to where it is you want to go. And with it you really will draw more in, and for that, you should be excited for what's in store. Buckle up. It'll be an amazing ride.

Tell me your thoughts on this one. I'd like to hear any and all ideas on ostensible optimism and hidden optimism. This is not just my blog - this is our blog!

What To Do When A Setback Occurs

One of the frequent questions I have been getting is this: What do you do when a setback occurs? If something truly negative happens to you, you can't just ignore it, right?

I've had these questions too, and I thought I would share some of the answers I have found.

The idea behind Operation: Optimism! revolves around the concept of "informed optimism." Informed optimism is not just a bland naivete, a la-la land way of living your life. Informed optimism means that on a basic level, you try to focus on the good things in life. The opportunities. You do your best not to complain and feel as though you are a victim of the world around you. Because you are not a victim; you have tremendous power inside of you.

When a setback does occur, and in all likelihood it will occur at some point, it's best to do what you can to focus on the solution. If you need a little time to feel the pain, that is perfectly understandable. But have the confidence in yourself and your surroundings that whatever you need to get done, you will get done, and you will get it done in the best way possible. Definitely, definitely, be informed of your situation. Then understand that this too shall pass, and focus on what you can do to build a bridge toward a better life.

Informed optimism is not about blind faith in the goodness of the future. Informed optimism is understanding the reality that is today and working toward a better tomorrow. You can do this, no matter what occurs. If we work together at Operation: Optimism! toward crafting a better world for ourselves and our progeny, then there truly are no limits for us. As Michael J. Fox says in the title of his new book: Always Look Up. Your life, and the lives of those around you, will be enlightened as a result.

End of Hand Shaking?

In case anyone was wondering why we even need Operation: Optimism!, Look no further. When we start thinking about the death of hand shaking, we start down a slippery slope toward increasing isolation and unhappiness.

If you, like some others, have been wondering whether you should stop shaking hands in light of the recent outbreak of swine flu, FOXNews is right there to help you. They asked the doctor: Should we stop the handshake?

“Absolutely not,” says Dr. Keith Ablow, psychiatrist and FOXNews contributor.

“We’ve had threats of swine flu before, and we have faced other communicable diseases before without changing our basic pattern of interacting socially,” Ablow told FOXNews.com.

“Stopping the handshake could have a negative effect. We need human touch and genuine communication more than ever right now.”

We all knew the answer, though. Right?

Let us resolve to be more forward with one another, and to increase our connections with our fellow men and women. We can't let questions like this go unchecked, or ignore the voices of reason that get buried under the lead. This is our chance to prove to ourselves and one another that we are in this together, and that only together will we excite a revolution of optimism.

Taking it to the Next Level

I have been overwhelmed by the responses I have been receiving from Operation: Optimism! One member has taken it to the next level. Although I certainly advocate wearing your optimism on your proverbial sleeve, or something else like it, it might be better to wear clothing that will conceal this a little better. Or perhaps not. Either way, keep on smiling!

A little of what we are about

Operation: Optimism! is about reconnecting to the great things about life. For far too long, our imaginations have been hijacked by the sensationalist attack on our fear. The media is obviously at fault for a lot of this, but what is resulting has gone much further and much deeper than our nightly news.

I know this might not sound too positive, but there is a war that is being waged. On the one side are those who prey on our fears, who want us to start living a life of worry, of terror, of negativity. They want us to see all of the problems in the world, and then they want to add to those problems one worry at a time.

But there is another side, another movement brewing, a movement where people are taking back their minds. They are choosing a different path, where they have decided, enough is enough, where they think, I don't need to be afraid of the flu anymore. And even if the world will end, there is no point obsessing about it, because it does not help me.

We can all choose a different path, where we think about what is going right, and think about how we can make it better. This is not a pie-in-the-sky dream; this is informed optimism. And this is what Operation: Optimism! is all about.

The Beginning

I know what you are thinking, because I'm thinking the same thing. And neither of us is alone.

With the onset of flus and bombs and other various objects of fear, there will come a time when we are going to have to choose. Between happiness and terror. Between positivity and negativity. Between a smile and a frown.



Let this be the day you decide that you have had enough. Decide that yes, things might not be the easiest, but you know what? You have a lot to be grateful for. And instead of thinking about what you don't have, you want to think about what you do have.

Let us begin this road together. I ask of you to take this journey with me and, on this first post, tell me about something good that happened to you today. I don't care how trivial it is; I want to know.